[Exhale]

The importance of school rarely slips my mind.
There are certain moments where I wish I was back into the modeling scene, but those moments last milliseconds.
For as long as I can remember, I have always valued my education.
I was extremely close to having my academic career flushed down the toilet recently and I must admit that I saw my life flash before my eyes.
If school was so "important" to me, how could I be in such a situation??

If I was expelled or suspended from school, what could I possibly tell my parents who pay my tuition 100% out of pocket? How could I possibly explain that to them? My parents who worked so hard to raise brilliant, God-fearing, family orientated, kindhearted children. Parents who put every ounce of their energy into their children. What could I possibly say to them?

I wouldn't be able to utter a word in a situation like that.


Needless to say, I am not only shocked but embarrassed to be in a situation like this this late in my college career and at this age! I know better, much better than what I showcased!! Although I cannot control other people, I must learn to diffuse situations regardless of what other people have to say. The fact of the matter is: My education means the world to me and I have worked long and hard to get to where I am right now and nothing is going to take that away.

I was blessed enough to not to be expelled or suspended from school, but what if I had not of been? I keep thinking about that over and over and I am truly disappointed in myself. Although I know that I cannot dwell in the past, I need a little bit of time to accept it and move on.

[sigh]

<----Gotta get it "together"!!